Loving, Hating, and Forgiving

After a couple of days of pondering, I figured (thanks to my mom and supportive friends) that hating is a waste of energy. Loving and forgiving is better. I did love him. I probably still do. I don’t want to hate him. No matter how much he’s hurt me, I can’t hurt him back. I was taught to never ever hurt the one you love. I hope he’s happy. I hope she’s happy. If they’re happy together, it’s all good. I forgive him. I forgive her. No matter how bitchy people think I am, I am not a hurtful person. I don’t like seeing people get hurt because I know how it feels. I would never ever wish that on someone else. It’s soul-crushing, mind and heart-numbing. I’m coming out of this a better person. I’m the only one who can make myself truly happy and healed from this experience. I hope he knows how much he meant to me, how much I cared for him, and how much I loved him. Good memories will always stay good. This bad memory will be gone very soon.

~ by Lorie on June 29, 2009.